It’s 9:15 pm.
The kids are all asleep
finally, and I’m debating whether I should fold the laundry, write a blog post, or snuggle up with a good book. Looks like the blog post won – but it’s really an explanation of sorts.
I haven’t been writing. I’ve tried to write this post 15 times to explain why, but the words just don’t seem to come out right.
What it really boils down to is this: I’m just tired. When I’m tired, everything else is affected.
More than that, though, I feel like I’ve dropped the ball a bit in the parenting department. Part of it is ‘mommy guilt‘ and I still have much to learn about grace. But there is a ribbon of truth woven through those feelings: I’ve been trying to do too much for this season.
“I live a Walmart life. I do a lot of things, but none of them particularly well,” Kat wrote, articulating what I’ve been struggling to express: I’m done living a WalMart life.
There are many things I want to write about – so many ideas that God has pressed on my heart. But time is running through my fingers, and I want to manage it well, giving the best of me to God and to my family. I’m done living a WalMart life.
I want to be Super Mom, but I’m not. I’m learning that there are things I can do, and things I can’t — and I’m learning to be okay with that.
So this is a long-winded way of saying: Though I love this community and sharing in this space, during this season of life, there will be some weeks that I write every day, and some weeks I might not write at all.
Maybe I don’t need to announce that, but I think it goes back to those expectations I mentioned a few months ago — I want to be up front with you because I care for you, and I care that you’re here. Even when I’m not writing often, I’m still thinking of you and praying for you and so, so grateful for this community.
So these past few weeks, I haven’t been writing, but I’ve been living. I have had so much fun engaging with my kids, relaxing with my husband, and soaking in good books! We went away, and we had family in. We’ve gone on treasure hunts and car rides. We’ve made dessert and told stories and laughed a lot.
Those things will continue, and writing will, too; just maybe at a different pace.
Question for you:
Have you ever struggled with keeping your priorities in line? Where did you cut back?