If You’re Wrestling with the Phrases

I dote wuv you as mutch sometimes, Mommy. When you n Daddy have bat attudes, den I dote wuv you as much.

Aww, little buddy, I know it can be frustrating when you disagree with Daddy or me, but I just want you to know that no matter what, I love you. If I’m upset, I still love you with all my heart. If you’re mad or having a bad attitude, I still love you with all my heart. Nothing can make me stop loving you.

Den why do you act mean when I havin’ a bat attude?

And so our conversation went at bedtime tonight, my three year old and me.

You know, writing these posts has become more and more difficult for me. It’s not so much about the act of sitting down and writing, it’s more about the internal wrestling that I feel.

I know I gave a disclaimer at the start of this series, but sometimes that doesn’t seem like enough. There is a part of me that worries about what you think as you’re reading this series.

I so want these phrases to be helpful to you, as they’ve been to me. I don’t want them to be a burden or to imply that there is some sort of ‘one size fits all’ parenting regimen that will solve all of your problems — as much as I want one, I remind myself all the time, there are no formulas in parenting! Parenting is a walk of faith. I’m just so grateful we are invited to walk with One who is faithful and Who leads with love and grace.

I don’t want to create some form of checklist to perfection, and I certainly don’t want to give the impression that writing these posts means I’ve got all of these discipline problems figured out. I don’t! at all.

I mess up motherhood — daily.

Loving well? Sacrificing for others? Having patience when I’m so. very. tired? Daily, friends. I struggle daily.

This past week has been especially challenging. I’ve been short tempered and distracted and my tone has been out-of-control on more than one occasion.

I have to tell you, in those moments I want to hang my head in shame and discouragement. Have you ever been there? Felt that way?

In those moments of defeat, I have to remind myself to get up, look up, and hold tight to grace. God hasn’t called me to wallow in despair. When I confess my sin, He forgives and there is no condemnation. God gives us a fresh start.

Today, I need a fresh start. Maybe you do, too.

 God, make a fresh start in me, shape a Genesis week from the chaos of my life. Don’t throw me out with the trash, or fail to breathe holiness in me. Bring me back from gray exile, put a fresh wind in my sails! (Psalm 51:10-12, MSG)

“The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is His faithfulness; His mercies begin afresh each morning” (Lamentations 3:22-23, NLT)